Intentions to Start Your New Year
As a working mom of three (Ethan 7, Bennett 3 and Kendall 1) I’m often asked how I balance the demands of work with the demands of raising little ones. And each time I’m asked, my first thought is to laugh. Balance? Not so much. Juggle? Maybe. Struggle (at times)? Definitely. But then I think to myself how lucky am I that I get to watch these beautiful tiny humans grow and change and morph and how lucky am I that I get to do what I love at the same time.
But I think we can all agree, Motherhood is haaaard.
So this year, instead of resolutions, I’m setting intentions. Resolutions feel like a January thing. My hope is that these intentions will last me through the next 11 months, too. Even as I write these it seemingly makes me feel better, calmer and dare I say it, more intentional with what my future holds in 2022. So here goes, this is what I’m striving for in the new year.
#1: Carving Out Me Time
A flight attendant reminds you that if the plane is going down, to put your oxygen mask on first before putting on your childs. So why don’t we translate that into day to day life? As moms, at times things can feel overwhelming, exhausting, intolerable even - moving forward this is going to be in my indicator that I need to step away (i.e. put on the lifejacket ASAP), to do something, anything that is 100% just for me. And while of course I want all the spa days and vacations just like the next person - sometimes that’s just not realistic (but if it is, PLEASE by all means!). So what is realistic? Taking a moment for a bubble bath late at night, doing a quick 5 minute yoga flow or meditation to recalibrate or telling my husband I gotta get some fresh air and a walk to clear my head sans kids. I can take a 5 minute (or longer!) break when I need it - and you should too.
#2: Being More Present
I recently read an article that said giving your kids just 10 minutes of super focused, quality play time each day makes a world of difference. It provides your kids with two primary emotional needs, significance and belonging. And while you’re probably thinking to yourself, I’m with my kids for hours on end each day, or when I get home from work I’m with my kids - but, when was the last time you got on the floor with and really, really played with them? Really got into their world for a fully uninterrupted, highly engaged period of time? I started to realize that of course I‘m with my kids when I’m not at work, but I could improve being really WITH them. So I’ve started doing this already this year and to be honest, I love it. The dedicated and intentional kid time has been fun for me and even more for them. I’m not saying I’ll be perfect each day, but my intention is there.
#3: Giving Myself Grace + Always Giving Thanks
We hear it all the time and we all know we should believe it. For me, it’s easier said than done. This year I’m going to remind myself each and every day that I’m a good mom, that I’m doing the very best that I can and that some days are going to go my way and some aren’t. And that’s okay. This is my year that instead of trying to be the Pinterest room mom, I’m going to be the “this was made with love but the best I can do at this moment” mom. I’m giving myself all the grace this year and maybe even more importantly I’m going to really try to change how I talk to myself. So often I’m thinking about all of the stuff that I didn’t get to, didn’t finish, haven’t done etc. This year is going to be about all of the things I did do, do have and feel good about. I do have healthy kids, I do have a loving and supportive husband, I do have so much love (and chaos!) in my home. Those are the things I’m grateful for and those are the things that I’ll focus on each day.
So tell me moms, are you setting intentions or resolutions for the new year? If so, I’d love to hear them! Leave a comment below.
Jeannine Benoit Adams is a mom of 3 and founder of Ready Pretty, a digital marketing and web design agency that supports female-led brands and businesses and is a supporter of The Chicago New Moms Group.